Are you blogging with confidence? Does your writing lack confidence?
Confidence, or lack of confidence, is a common problem for all kinds of creators, and bloggers are no exception.
Call it what you want, shyness, imposter syndrome, or having “thin skin,” but if you lack confidence in yourself or your writing then that insecurity comes through in your word choices and your statements to your reader.
Do you wish you had more confidence? I do. Every time I write a blog post I fight against the little “you are not good enough” voice in my head.
Plus, I definitely feel like not having enough confidence has held me back.
There’s also a part of me that whispers negative thoughts about other people, that they make up for a lack of ability with arrogance – an excess of confidence.
I try not to listen to that voice, but it does pop up a lot.
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How Much of a Problem for Bloggers is a Lack of Confidence?
Confidence in blogging does help, but if you don’t feel confident right now, how much of a problem is it?
First, when I can see things more clearly, I realize there are a lot of people who are successful despite their lack of confidence.
Bravery, after all, is feeling fear and doing stuff anyway.
Secondly, people sometimes find an excess of confidence repulsive and some humility can be endearing.
Excess of anything tends to be off-putting. A bit of vulnerability, without tugging on that lever too much, is a good thing.
Finally, when we worry about things it can show that we care.
Caring about things is usually good. For example, if you get on stage with zero nerves, does that mean you will do great or could it mean you are not as prepared as you could be?
So, not being 100% confident is not the end of everything, but still, it is better to be confident than not, right?
The Benefits of Confidence or Why Growing Your Confidence is Worth It
Confidence is not the only thing you need to be successful in business or life in general, but it sure helps.
Aside from the personal benefits, it helps you be a better creator, mentor, coach, business leader, and human being.
Why?
When you are confident, you pass that confidence on.
It comes through in your writing, your products, and in how you service your customers.
When you are confident, giving, and humble, it also empowers others. It helps people feel like they can count on you when they need you, but not be wholly reliant on you.
They can take what you’ve taught them and take action, giving them more confidence in their own abilities and pursuits.
Would you rather take advice from someone who radiates confidence or someone who is unsure of themselves?
Confidence also attracts business partners, networking contacts, and people who want to work with you in other ways, such as podcast interviews or affiliates.
Tips for Growing Your Confidence as a Blogger
So you want to grow your blogging confidence or even confidence in yourself?
While there is no magical, instant solution that would work in a professional context, there are some ideas about growing confidence that I have found helpful.
1. Be curious. Listen and pay attention, and then speak (or blog).
Take the spotlight and move it on to someone else.
It’s hard to say the wrong thing when you are letting other people do most of the talking. Despite how it might feel, it is not necessarily your job to fill conversational voids.
When you do say something, try asking questions and follow-up questions.
Curiosity is remarkably attractive.
2. Put your blogging focus on delivering value.
Again, this is about turning the spotlight onto the audience, the person you are trying to help, rather than yourself.
It’s not about you, it’s about what you are doing for others. You are not talking (or writing, or painting) to be heard, but for a reason. What is that reason—to deliver a message, make someone feel something, to get another person to take action?
Focus on what will bring about that outcome, not your blushes, sweaty palms, or how your voice might sound.
3. Let your blog audience support you – Look for friendly (and honest) faces.
Bloggers are often afraid of negative feedback but we can exaggerate the problem in our minds. Did you know most people who come to your blog do NOT want you to fail?
I know, sounds weird right? Especially for anyone who has spent more than a millisecond on the internet.
But it is true!
It’s especially true when you are delivering something that the person asked for.
People searching Google are looking for a good answer. They want your blog to give them want they were hoping to find!
A person might have accepted an invitation to a talk you are giving or clicked on your YouTube video link, hit play on your podcast, or opened up your PDF.
Do those people want you to fail or do they want to get what you promised?
Now, obviously, when you make that invitation, be it an actual invite or the headline of your content, you need to then deliver on the promise.
Clickbait, aka Bait and Switch, is not polite, so you can understand if people get a little miffed when you waste their time, but otherwise, they want the solution, the entertainment, the education, or the art that you offered them.
Blows to Blogging Confidence AKA When Blog Readers Are Mean
Sometimes people are just mean. Comments on your blog or on social media can knock our confidence to the ground. Been there, worn the pulled-tight hoodie of shame.
You might get feedback that is difficult to hear that was not intended to hurt, too. That is a part of putting your creativity out there in public. Even when people are not good at delivering it in a sensitive way, feedback can help you grow.
Hearing bad news is hard, though it can be easier when you have other people to offer perspective. Ask for help from people who won’t just tell you what you want to hear. Is the feedback valid or have you attracted a troll?
One of the things I get told a lot is that people hate my accent.
“I couldn’t understand the Scottish guy”
is a common complaint on feedback forms from events I have spoken at. Even though I am not Scottish.
The strange thing is, I have also been told by people that they love my British accent and that I should never change it. I wish I could say that I can ignore the former or at least focus on the latter, but I can’t.
That said, anticipating it and knowing there is not much I can do about the problem does kind of help.
4. Know you and your blog can’t please everybody.
Your blog can’t please everyone. You as a blogger simply can not please everybody. Nor should you.
In fact, repelling some people is a good thing. Not everyone is a good fit for what you do.
I am glad now when some people find me personally offensive because it saves headaches and heartaches down the line.
Rather than attempt to please someone who will never be on the same page as you, let them find their own corner of the community and leave you to yours.
5. Find your blogging niche and be confident in that.
Ask me to do any mental math on demand, and I am definitely not going to be confident, but ask me about something I am passionate about, am experienced with, and spend my days obsessing about?
Well, then you might find it difficult to get me to shut up.
We all have our superpowers, and we all have our Kryptonite. Knowing yours is very helpful.
If you were a fish you wouldn’t judge yourself on your tree-climbing ability.
Bonus Tip: Write With Fear, Edit With Confidence
Did you know you can edit your blog post after you have written it?
OK, that is probably condescending but the truth is we do not have to let the fear leak out into our writing!
Here are some ways you can “Edit Out Doubts“:
Hedge Words: I use phrases like “I think” and “maybe” a lot but removing them makes my statements sound so much stronger. So, instead of “I think this method might work,” go for “This works.”
Active vs Passive: “The research was carried out by me.” Sounds a bit roundabout, right? Now I say, “I carried out the research.” Direct and to the point.
Fighting Passive Zombies: Blogging Top Tip
Concerned your writing might be in passive voice? Simply add the phrase “by zombies” and if it still makes grammatical sense, it’s in the passive voice and needs to be beaten until it stops twitching.
Eg.
Finally, the blog post was published by Zombies!
Stop Apologizing: Have you ever started a blog post with “I’m sorry but…?” I have. Many times. And guess what? Most of those times, there was nothing to apologize for. Do not apologize for not having posted for a while, just give people valuable information and most will forgive you, or will not have noticed you have been away!
Self-deprecating Humor: Yes, my humor is very self-deprecating, and it gets a chuckle or two, but sometimes it might make us sound less confident to the point where people start to believe us rather than get the joke. I used to say, “I’m no tech guru, but I believe …” Now I try to say instead “Based on my experiments …”
Leave no Wiggle: Conclusions should leave an impact. Instead of, “So, maybe these tips might help some of you?” try, “These strategies are sure to help. Let me know the results you get.”
Specificificity: Instead of being vague and saying, “Studies suggest,” it’s better to mention the specific study and what the conclusions were. It adds weight and validity to the statement.
Seek Out Feedback: Yeah, that sounds as appealing as me saying “Invite spiders to crawl into your mattress“. I used to be terrified of feedback, myself. But over time, I’ve realized that sharing my post with a no-nonsense but kind friend before publishing has only made my writing stronger.
Are You Asking?: Over the years I have met a lot of people who would respond “Are you asking me or telling me?” because I hedge by phrasing a statement as a question. Instead of ending with a question mark, turn the sentence into a statement.
Trust Your Knowledge and Experience: I’ve realized that confidence in writing, just like in life, comes from trusting yourself. It’s okay to have a point of view.
Sure, editing out the doubts makes the post sound more confident. But remember, it’s also about authenticity. Don’t edit the YOU out of your writing!
Bottom Line: Being a human blogger is actually OK!
Growing confidence is worthwhile, it will make you feel better and will help you achieve your goals. That said I find people, on balance, like to relate to people. The funny thing, we all have flaws. The people who pretend to be perfect tend to get found out eventually.
We prefer bloggers who are human!
It’s ok to be a bit of a mess. Let’s all be a bit messy together.
